Hand up - ya boy has been overwhelmed the last month. I was operating at full-capacity in an attempt to survive & advance every hour. Not day. Not week. Not month. I was in a state of pure reaction with merely a dash or proactivity. I’ve owed you a monthly mindset but for my own well-being, I had to hedge and instead provide an end-of-year note from yours truly.

All throughout October, I believed this month would be all about acceleration. If you recall, we were all gas no brakes, deeply entrenched in the New York of old with bourbon often in hand. Barry and I agree that when you’re “winning” or experiencing a stretch of positivity; you have to ride the wave. You act with instinct and never over-calculate. One false step would thrust you out of that current and nobody wants to abandon the runner’s high.

I’ve been saying “moving & grooving” quite a bit. It’s typically in response to someone asking me if I’m able to keep up with the pace of a thousand speedwalkers (just imagine the friction). I went from a calm, stagnant WFH lifestyle to the 2019 LSU Tiger no-huddle offense. Things are great, just carving out my spot in the points-driven system.

Truth be told, I’ve been stagnate, but not for the reasons you may think. Ordinarily, it’s the dog days of summer as we gear up for the turning of leaves. In my case, personal and professional blockages have cast me into limbo as if the Merovingian himself confused me for Neo. Down in Mobil Avenue Station I wander seeking answers while poking and prodding to accelerate the process (to no avail, of course). It was a product of my work from home situation, former role, pursuit of a love interest, unpreparedness to branch out socially, and lack of mobility.

Our early 20s are unstable, and I sit here on the last leg of the “early” portion (yes, I am 25 which I suppose makes me a “mid 20s” guy, but let’s gloss over the details for the sake of the piece). Without the abundance of time we had in our youth and college, we’re faced with critical decisions each day on how we spend our time.

One of my biggest fears is missing out on an opportunity due to indecision. Could be a new role, person, situation; the list goes on. At the same time, that fear is matched with the thought of that opportunity not materializing whatsoever. It’s a dangerous game I play trying to remain balanced. How do I stay in the middle?